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B: "Vlad, have you ever considerated being human?"
B: "I mean, vampires have wierd weaknesses, hurt people to steal their blood..."
B: "...are stalked by fans and enemies and immortality can be boring. Wouldn't you like to change?"
V: Change? You mean, being a superficial jerkass who destroys the environment and harms my health with bad habits? No, thanks."
B: "Vlad, how much does becoming a vampire hurts?"
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Be careful, Vlad is watching you.